So this is very overdue, let's talk Momma Life.
Well it was a very long and tough journey getting pregnant and becoming a mom and I actually touched base on this in my upcoming memoir "The Motherless Children" So it took us after trying for 2 years to get pregnant with a 50% chance of even conceiving and a fake positive to lead us to be parents of this little boy. For me, I wanted nothing more then to have him vaginally and everything go good because when its your first baby and with any child you want everything to go as smooth as possible and when you don't know what to expect it is just really can hit you hard when you least expect it. At 39 weeks (it got real) so this may be a bit TMI but we're talking about Momma life here. It was really late into the morning probably about 2 or so in the morning and you know I had to have that thousand visit to the bathroom (it seemed as time went the more your bladder was over controlled by this little baby) Anyways, I discovered that there was blood in my urine (very scary) to say the least because I didn't have symptoms of being in labor or that my water broke and no signs of the mucus plug from what I knew anyway. So to be safe I had asked my dad if it was normal and we just decided to go to the hospital (which seemed like I always there with different sicknesses, I had the stomach virus and you name it while I was pregnant it wasn't fun). So we get to the hospital and they do checks and all that to see if my water even broke and it took two test for it to come back to say that in fact my water indeed did break so I then got sent into a delivery room after sitting there forever it seemed it had been a few hours just waiting. So we get to the room and they do all the normal stuff - eventually my OBGYN arrived and then it came to the drugs to really help dilation and the labor process. This is where it gets crazy so I was there for a while with no change with dilation so after 18 hours of labor they told me it was time to think about a C-Section because it already has been a while with no change and it is starting to be a dangerous situation for both me and baby and I honestly was so sad but also so scared because I honestly didn't want that for my delivery but apart of me knew it probably was going to happen because my family has a history with C-Sections but in my mind I wanted to experience everything as a first time mom but I knew in reality I had no choice it was life or death and we went into surgery and on January 10 at 8:25 pm Ethan Alan was born weighing 7lbs 2oz and 8 1/2 inches long and we was so excited but with the epidural I just couldn't move to really see him so that sucked. Eventually, Ethan was sent to do all the test and procedures as a newborn but we eventually got to do skin to skin (which was incredible and I recommend this because it is just so magical to just spend that time with your baby). The only person who was really there for us at the time was Dad and you all know you can't eat when you are in labor or after having a baby for a while and so my dad and husband went and got food but this is where it gets interesting. So I was laying down resting and I seen a bedbug in the bed and I then tell the nurse about it and we eventually wind up in quarantine and I had called my husband to explain to him what's going on and they come back. We couldn't have no visitors and we had to take all our stuff into our car which sucked because that included the baby's clothes and even our technology. We had to move rooms and then eventually we was able to have some visitors which was his mom and sister. It definitely was a stressful situation and to add more on it Ethan didn't pass his hearing test at birth and then we also got to take photos and we were hoping for some family ones but the lady was rude. It was a horrible experience for a first mother. We was in the hospital for at least 4 days and we was so over it honestly but we eventually came home. Also, we both chose to do formula for our child and I know many have judged me for that because they assume breastfeeding should be the only choice. For me I knew I didn't eat the best or probably didn't have the best for him because whether you want to admit or not whatever you eat or consume so does your baby. In mind he was still healthy and everything was great with him.
(another picture of baby Ethan)
It was definitely great to come home but then it was recovery time and that took a bit but it wasn't so bad only for the bad pains when I coughed and my neck was having some nerve issues and I guess it was from the epidural and being legit not able to move. I guess we all handle it differently. Let's speed this up so after 2 weeks of having Ethan we ended up changing his doctor (because of reasons) and in the end his new doctor told us he had a heart murmur and it looked like he might of had issues with his back but in the end it was just his heart murmur and learned he had a mild valve issue which was a tough journey to get through but we finally got good news at his check up that it there was no issues and we didn't need the specialist anymore. I was so blessed that everything was okay.
Essentials to have in your hospital bag:
Paperwork, ID, and Insurance
Chapstick (I know mine always got dry and it helped)
Entertainment (having something to do helps kill the time)
Diapers & Clothes & Wipes for baby I picked about 4 or so outfits with diapers and wipes because it is always great to have extra for your own.
Nightgown (honestly I wish I had thought of it (wouldn't of mattered because of my experience)
Pads and big undies (this is definitely something you should have)
Phone, phone charger. (a camera unless your using your phone)
Clothes for you and hubs.
Money for venting machine
Pacifiers & Bottles and formula (I mean the hospital does provide their already made formula in bottles but it doesn't hurt to have your own because it can be hard to wait. - also if you plan to pump bring your own (I don't know if the hospital has some)
Toiletries
Hand Sanitizer - it is always a great for when someone wants to touch or hold your baby.
Glasses or contacts - for me I just wore my glasses much easier to deal with.
Important mentions:
Be sure to have the car seat installed correctly because in order to leave you have to have a car seat.
Car seat cover (it was great to have those because Ethan was born in the winter it was cold and we had the cozy one)
Now:
(This little baby will be 5 in January)
So we've been trying to get Ethan potty trained since ever and it has been the most hardest challenge considering has he had speech problem and getting to understand what he had to do and I had no clue how or what to do I've looked at so many tips and I've seen other mothers go through the same thing with their boys and I just want him to be potty trained I mean he is almost 5 and in pre-school. We all have tried to get him to do anything but he'd just sit there and do nothing. It has been hard but I think eventually he'll get it with time of course. I think it is the hardest thing to try to figure out because our case Ethan has IEP and other issues that were trying to get the real concept of maybe understanding it. I think as parents it is frustrating because all you want is for them to be healthy and be the best person possible. In the end I think he'll get where he needs to be in life but I am proud of the progress he has made with learning.
Being a mom or a parent can be a hard and tough journey but the ending result is beautiful. I look forward to all years of watching him grow and learn but also continue speaking more and eventually not being so picky with food and get potty trained because for us that is some big accomplishments for him and I know he can do it.
That's all!
XOXO
